WARNING this column contains spoilers regarding the last two Captain America films.

Not the latest one. I haven't seen that yet. That's kind of why I writing this column.

Anyway I've always wanted to start a column with a spoiler alert. Like those guys who write about Game of Thrones in the nationals but there's not much need for one when you're writing about allotments, itinerant dogs, and running children around to various after school clubs.

So here we go. Captain America, and in particular The First Avenger (that's the first film) and Winter Soldier (that's the second film), because next week I'm on my own Marvel superhero mission taking my littlest lad to the cinema with some of his friends to watch the third film, Civil War.

Except I wasn't allowed to take him and his friends to watch the film unless I was up to speed with the ones that went previously.

"Don't worry," I told him, "I'll pick up the story. How hard can it be?"

By the look of disgust on his little face, apparently every hard indeed.

"Ok, I'll google it and find out the story from that."

Nope, that wasn't good enough either. I had to watch both films because if I didn't know what was going on and I had to ask a really stupid question in front of his friends, well like that would be the worst, most embarrassing thing, like ever!

So at the weekend I sat down and watched The First Avenger where Captain America came into existence in some kind of drug experiment testing type scenario akin to how the East Germans won all the athletics medals in the Seventies. But with Captain America all that drug stuff is ok because he's a superhero and everything.

Set during the Second World War, it basically involves a rather nasty group called Hydra who through the use of an infinity stone (more on that in a later column I think) want to take over the world.

Anyway towards the end of the film, the Cap's best friend Bucky Barnes (no really, that is his name), plummets to his presumed death into an icy crevice leading to much soul searching by Mr America.

So to the next film and we're in more modern times (it would take too long to explain), and there's this really bad, mysterious, and I cannot stress the word mysterious enough, new villain called the Winter Soldier.

"Oh that'll be the Cap's friend Bucky, or whatever he was called," I announce to the boys.

Cue gasps of astonishment.

"How did you know?"

"Duh, well for a start he plummeted into an icy crevice, which is obviously very handy if you want to bring back someone from the dead 70 years later," I replied.

And to be honest there were about a gazillion other clues, like the Cap wandering around a museum exhibition to himself (show-off) and he chances upon an exhibit to his friend Bucky. Oh, and I read the story on the internet beforehand!

But of course my little wheeze has spectacularly backfired because now the Little Lad is worried I'm going to ruin the new film for his friends by guessing what's going to happen.

Do you know what, I'll just keep my mouth shout and buy the popcorn shall I?

NEIL D'ARCY-JONES

Keep those Weekend Window messages coming to friends and family by e-mailing me at neil.darcy-jones@nqe.com

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"Well done on the show Claire. You were amazing!" Sally.